Extended family

I got an instant message from my great aunt this morning. The same ne that said she was going to hide me n Facebook because I curse. She said " hello " and I said "hi" and the next thing she said blew me away. She first went in about her Candy Crush game and how she was only testing to see if chat worked and then said, " because I knew if I didn't screw it up you would answer me." 

I didn't ask for details. I just told her I didn't know what she was talking about because I've never played Candy Crush. It almost felt like she was implying I'm touchy. Maybe? I don't know. Why would you say, " if I didn't screw this up." Does she think I'm that touchy? I've never bit her head off. I've never told her she is wrong. Nothing. I've always been nice to her. Even when she told me I was vulgar and that she didn't like seeing that. I even helped her by telling her how she could hide me so she wouldn't see my posts without de-friending me. I'm always helpful and kind to her. 

Yes, I curse. Yes, I tend to be vulgar. No, this does not mean I'm a vicious satanic mental patient on the edge and angry all the time. I do get angry, yes, but who doesn't? I'm not perfect and I don't pretend to be. I think might be the issue. I don't pretend to be perfect. I don't attend church. I don't watch my Ps and Qs. I curse. End of story. I curse. Clearly I have sinned and must be ignored by my family forever. 

The problem with my family is if I was a man this wouldn't even be an issue. 

I've struggled my whole life with being myself and my family being what they want. My mom did her best to shield me from their disapproval but she is not here and I am adult now. My mother never told me I shouldn't be me. She encouraged it. She told me the story of how in church she was deemed a slut because of her clothing. She was told to dress like SoinSo, more lady like and proper. My mother, the virgin, was judged on her clothing and it colored her opinion of church people after that. What happened to old SoinSo? Oh, she ended up an unwed teenage mother. That story has stuck with me always. I think of it every time someone wants to tell me to be proper. " fuck you and your proper behavior." Our country was not founded on proper behavior. 

I wouldn't say I'm a rebel. I don't act a certain way to get attention. I just want to be accepted for being me. It's that simple. I'm not going to change because you dislike my style. 

Perhaps I'm reading something that is not there in what my aunt said but all I know is that since my mother died the family has dropped me like a hot potato. I've even sent emails and get zero reply. Imagine what would happen if I said, "I'm gay and my partner is black!"