Friday, April 6, 2012

Birthday depression

Birthdays have always been tough for me in the past. Drunk family fighting, family forgetting about me and going to my cousins wedding, my folks having a party for me and not letting me special for fear I would become a brat, and the large amount of pictures of fake smiles or tear streaked face and swollen eyes. This year was/it's no different. If I hadn't taken the boys to a movie I wouldn't have had that. My husband didn't even get home until 11pm. By then I was tear streaked and lonely. My moms not here so I didn't have her to talk to and my Dad forgot it was my birthday.

I do my best at looking at the bright side and not wanting to complain and whine but damn it, I'd like to be and see someone and do something and have someone give more than 2 hoots.

I don't have depression because I'm getting older. I have birthday depression because I feel like I'm getting older alone without anybody giving damn besides lip service.


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