Recently, an email list serve of a multicultural group, I belong to started to post again. My first gut reaction was dread. I was really liking the fact that we were not discussing anything. No classes. No nothing. I really liked the peace it provided by being dead.
Then the email came through to asks us all to respond to the idea of a class forming. I literally rolled my eyes as I read the email. I ignored it and went on my happy way until someone contacted me by phone and said I had yet responded. I explained to them why and they told me to post it. I did. After I posted it the emails flowed in with the tell tale "OUCH!" meaning the people reading my explanation did not like something I said. Then I remembered why I dreaded the group even more.
The jest of what I said was I was not interested in coming to another meeting with privileged white guys talking about minorities. I was one of only 3 women that would show up to the meetings. One meeting I was the only woman. Anybody that has met me will tell you I am not a typical woman. I meet women all the time, trust me, I am not one of those. The other 2 women were not very typical either. In fact most typical women would not come to a meeting full of men to talk about cultural issues. Nope, wouldn't happen. Tell me how that was being multicultural? We had a couple white men that are gay, but if they had not said anything you would not know they were gay, just more privileged white men.
I spoke on how it was not a multicultural meeting with a bunch of white guys. I applaud them for wanting to learn more about other cultures. They need a different approach. Further more they need to stop being so fucking sensitive. Being weepy, ouchy, and touchy does not make you look sincere. It makes you look guilty and remorseful. If you have not acted inappropriate to said minorities and cultures then why get so upset? We all must work through our journey. We all must create our lives. I cannot and will not be responsible to a group of people that have let their culture be a chip on their shoulder and their reason for being irresponsible themselves. Granted, I know there are people out there that hate people. Law of attraction states that those with like thoughts attract. There are gays out there that have never been harassed. Blacks never treated badly. Women never raped. Etc....
Why? Because they never believed in it. They did not concentrate on it. They did not let the injustice of other rule their life. They remained steadfast in their beliefs that all is well and life is great and they have it. Meanwhile, their friends and family have terrible incident after terrible incident. They can only see and feel the pain and they keep getting more of what they expect and believe.
I cannot and will not be brought down to hold space for these people. I am not about to let my good life be compromised for those that cannot be responsible for their life and create something better.
Does this mean I am always treated fairly because I think good happy thoughts? No, it does not. There are those that hate women, gays, blacks, Mexicans, Indians, and even white males. This just means I need to separate myself from the situation and not return. I shall create my world and realize that my thoughts attracted that negative situation and move on. I can avoid those haters. It is possible.
Having a group that passes around videos of women getting raped, black people shooting themselves, and what ever horrifying bullshit they can come up with to sit around and whimper, "Oh my, ain't it awful. You poor thing." Or remarking with "ouch" every damn time someone speaks their truth is quite honestly the biggest waste of time and energy in my opinion.
I cannot and will not sit around always having men tell me what I can and cannot say because it is not right to my own gender. I was reprimanded because I said "chic." Give me a fucking break. Has that what human society has come to? So sensitive we can't use slang? one man in group meeting said the men shouldn't cuss in front of "the ladies." I was thinking, "What the fuck, who let ladies in here?"
I have a really hard time dealing with those men particular. They are very obnoxious to speak with. I hold my tongue and bottle my rage quite often. In fact, I did the other day as well. I have decided that I am going to leave the group. That kind of energy I feel does not create love and joy. It only makes me hate men more. They only speak about wanting to know others but what they really want is an "ain't it awful" group where they can tell me I am wrong and they are right. There are no discussions, just always tell me I am wrong for being me.
Time to move on from a dysfunctional group. I can treat people respect when they deserve it. People need to man up and be responsible for themselves and stop waiting for the rest of us to change for you. Find the people opposite of you that enjoys you and begin there. Stop trying to reason with dolts. I am! Not going to say another word to any one on that list. I am ending the cycle of bitchy, touchy, menopausal, grouchy, know it all "save the world" white men!
Then the email came through to asks us all to respond to the idea of a class forming. I literally rolled my eyes as I read the email. I ignored it and went on my happy way until someone contacted me by phone and said I had yet responded. I explained to them why and they told me to post it. I did. After I posted it the emails flowed in with the tell tale "OUCH!" meaning the people reading my explanation did not like something I said. Then I remembered why I dreaded the group even more.
The jest of what I said was I was not interested in coming to another meeting with privileged white guys talking about minorities. I was one of only 3 women that would show up to the meetings. One meeting I was the only woman. Anybody that has met me will tell you I am not a typical woman. I meet women all the time, trust me, I am not one of those. The other 2 women were not very typical either. In fact most typical women would not come to a meeting full of men to talk about cultural issues. Nope, wouldn't happen. Tell me how that was being multicultural? We had a couple white men that are gay, but if they had not said anything you would not know they were gay, just more privileged white men.
I spoke on how it was not a multicultural meeting with a bunch of white guys. I applaud them for wanting to learn more about other cultures. They need a different approach. Further more they need to stop being so fucking sensitive. Being weepy, ouchy, and touchy does not make you look sincere. It makes you look guilty and remorseful. If you have not acted inappropriate to said minorities and cultures then why get so upset? We all must work through our journey. We all must create our lives. I cannot and will not be responsible to a group of people that have let their culture be a chip on their shoulder and their reason for being irresponsible themselves. Granted, I know there are people out there that hate people. Law of attraction states that those with like thoughts attract. There are gays out there that have never been harassed. Blacks never treated badly. Women never raped. Etc....
Why? Because they never believed in it. They did not concentrate on it. They did not let the injustice of other rule their life. They remained steadfast in their beliefs that all is well and life is great and they have it. Meanwhile, their friends and family have terrible incident after terrible incident. They can only see and feel the pain and they keep getting more of what they expect and believe.
I cannot and will not be brought down to hold space for these people. I am not about to let my good life be compromised for those that cannot be responsible for their life and create something better.
Does this mean I am always treated fairly because I think good happy thoughts? No, it does not. There are those that hate women, gays, blacks, Mexicans, Indians, and even white males. This just means I need to separate myself from the situation and not return. I shall create my world and realize that my thoughts attracted that negative situation and move on. I can avoid those haters. It is possible.
Having a group that passes around videos of women getting raped, black people shooting themselves, and what ever horrifying bullshit they can come up with to sit around and whimper, "Oh my, ain't it awful. You poor thing." Or remarking with "ouch" every damn time someone speaks their truth is quite honestly the biggest waste of time and energy in my opinion.
I cannot and will not sit around always having men tell me what I can and cannot say because it is not right to my own gender. I was reprimanded because I said "chic." Give me a fucking break. Has that what human society has come to? So sensitive we can't use slang? one man in group meeting said the men shouldn't cuss in front of "the ladies." I was thinking, "What the fuck, who let ladies in here?"
I have a really hard time dealing with those men particular. They are very obnoxious to speak with. I hold my tongue and bottle my rage quite often. In fact, I did the other day as well. I have decided that I am going to leave the group. That kind of energy I feel does not create love and joy. It only makes me hate men more. They only speak about wanting to know others but what they really want is an "ain't it awful" group where they can tell me I am wrong and they are right. There are no discussions, just always tell me I am wrong for being me.
Time to move on from a dysfunctional group. I can treat people respect when they deserve it. People need to man up and be responsible for themselves and stop waiting for the rest of us to change for you. Find the people opposite of you that enjoys you and begin there. Stop trying to reason with dolts. I am! Not going to say another word to any one on that list. I am ending the cycle of bitchy, touchy, menopausal, grouchy, know it all "save the world" white men!
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